Photos of new babies

Kids

It's early, but we have the first of this season's new baby goats. I forgot from last year to this, how wonderful they are. The first boy arrived yesterday, and is the size of a 2 week old. He's healthy and hearty. We are having fun thinking of big boy names. The twin girls came today - earlier than expected. They seem healthy, but momma is not nursing as well as we'd like. We hope she takes to it soon. Both girls seem healthy, but it may be too soon to tell. Katie and Madison were loving it almost as much as us big girls were. We live vicariously through our kids don't you know. Here they are - my kid and the goat kid!

Kentucky New Era News Free 13 cats and a still

This is a great story of ingenuity! I admire this couple's tenacity, even if I don't support their product.

Kentucky New Era News Free 13 cats and a still

Seriously - You want me to do what?

On our vacation, Robert and Madison did most of the activity planning. We did two or three things a day. It was great. I enjoyed not having to do much except go along. I'll post our photo album when we get home. Despite not feeling physically well lately, I have been stable. I haven't had much stomach or sleeping trouble. That's about as good as it gets for me. I was feeling fine - emotionally and physically.

We finished at Lookout Mountain, and stopped for our next activity - Ruby Falls. I was really expecting that we were going to walk up to the falls and walk back down at our leisure. I had no idea that it was an underground venture. When we got into the gift shop area, I realized that the tour started by going underground by elevator into a cave that we would explore WITHOUT bathrooms for about a 1 hour tour. My heart started to beat out of my chest. The irrational thoughts started immediately, and I got the feeling that I wanted to run away from whatever was chasing/threatening me.

One thing that I tell my anxiety DO clients is that once you have anxiety, you will probably always have it - hopefully to a much milder degree. I was reminded immediately of my former anxiety/panic DO. My mind reverted to that coping skill in an instant. I knew that I would benefit from medication (Xanax), so I went for it first. I do not take any other anxiety medication now, because my DO is not currently active. You have to admit that this was an unusual situation. I was not sick or panicky earlier, so I took the professional advise that I dish out each day - face your fear. I went on the tour. It is hard to explain what happened, but I am emotional just remembering it now. I'm going to blog this in an attempt to (1) help myself process the event, and (2) help others who might need some encouragement.

The elevator was packed. I didn't mind that, but I knew that the next hour was going to be uncomfortable instead of enjoyable. It was difficult for me to think straight. Physically, my hands started sweating and I got hot. Once underground, I was glad that it was cool. I took off my jacket, and wished I could have shed my sneakers. I was a bit dizzy and disoriented. I kept looking at the others and envying their "normalcy". I knew that they had no idea what was going on with me, but I couldn't look anyone in the eye. We had to take a pic at first. I wish I had that photo now to see if it showed on my face what I was going through. I felt as if I was the only person there; like I was super-sensitive aware of what was going on with me - my breathing, my emotions, my decision-making processes. I was trying to figure out how to get back to the top - face the embarrassment of asking to go back before I panicked.

I was looking down at my feet most of the time, and watching my leg shake nervously. I did everything I knew to do - distract myself, breath normal but deep. I couldn't get enough air. I knew better than to focus on my stomach. I prayed for strength and time - always time. At the first point-of-no-return, I told Robert that I was going back. I started walking the trail to the elevator, and I felt myself relaxing. Either my pill kicked in, or God intervened. I returned to the group and told Robert that I thought my medication started to work. He held my hand, and apologized for not being more careful. After that, I tried to focus on the tour guide, and I prayed that my stomach would hold up. It did. Once I was at the falls, I felt like I would make it.

Hind sight . . .

Later, my daughter asked me what was wrong with me. I told her that I have an anxiety DO that bothers me at times. She knows that I have suffered in the past with panic, but she was asking for me to explain it. She asked what I was scared of, and I told her that it's as if I am scared of panic; of not being able to escape (technical term is agoraphobia). She asked if I had claustrophobia. I said that it wasn't that, because I wasn't worried about the cave situation or the tight spots as much as I was about not being able to break apart from the group and have privacy in the event that I panicked. It's a terrible feeling. IRRATIONAL. I'm totally aware of how irrational it is when I am feeling panicky. It makes it more frustrating.

What made this experience different than times before? Realizations! The situation was unexpected, I've been practicing avoidance coping more than I knew. I haven't been isolated like that in years. I need to put myself out there more. I wanted to cry at any moment. I didn't remember that response in the past. I was happy that I used techniques effectively, but I wasn't convinced that they would work. They do work! I faced the fear, and it worked out this time.

Here's me at Ruby Falls - 20 minutes underground from where they dropped us off at the elevator. Am I glad I saw it? Glad has a different meaning for me. If I never see it again, I will be OK.

Lookout mountain, Chattanooga, TN

All throughout our vacation we talked about naming the "highlight of our trip". This was what we decided was at the top of each of our lists. It was the perfect day for the trip to Rock City and Lookout Mountain. If you look closely, you'll see seven states!

Tweenage Enthusiasm

On our vacation to Chatanooga, Madison entered this part of the tour of Rock City. She is a gem and rock enthusiast. Many people do not know that she is an amateur geologist. The walls of this cave were covered with monster chunks of quartz, pirite, fools gold - you name it. She had said out loud several times how much she "loved this place". At her age, it is rare to get those type of enthusiastic responses, so I tried to catch it on video. This is what I got. Typical! HA

Affirmation

I received a text yesterday from a teen CT who was wondering if I'd be seeing him that morning at school. I quickly replied that that I'd be there. His return text simply read, "Awesome".

Homeschool Geaks

This is dedicated to the homeschool families that I know and love!!!! Kendra (my sister-in-law) better get busy. I thought she was swamped with three - according to his expert video, she's way behind!

What does this video mean to you?

What do you think Miranda is saying in this song? What's her option? This is a common problem that I see in my office. Just wondering what others think of the situation.

Miranda Lambert

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It's that time again?

I feel like my disease has awakened - like the alarm clock sounded. My doctor says that the meds I take are intended to keep the door closed tight on my autoimmune disorder. Occasionally, for reasons we don't know, the door cracks open. My symptoms begin to reappear. I experience what my grandmother would call a "flare" - a common term used to describe when lupus symptoms are active. I have gotten so used to them, that I can almost predict the next one to come. What's amazing, is that they are so seemingly unrelated. Let me give you an example. I begin to feel nervous. I will probably have stomach problems immediately. Over the course of several weeks, the skin on my face gets darker and a spot on my tongue shows up. My hair will start to shed in hand-fulls, or will stop depending on what it was doing previous to my "flare". I will get the jitters and a sense of foreboding will settle over me. I will lose my appetite and weight will follow. I will ache and hurt all over. I will have trouble sleeping, or I will want to sleep all the time.

These are just a small sampling of the symptoms. The good news is that I know what's happening, and I don't think I'm dying or going crazy anymore. I understand that I am just having an episode. My doctor will try to slam the door shut again by adjusting my medication.

I try to help my counseling clients understand that their emotional problems are sometimes similar to physical problems. Maybe if they can realize that their depression, anxiety or mood disorders are episodic, they can cope a bit easier with what's happening to them? One of the best things about understanding that I am having a "flare" is knowing that it will eventually get better - that in time it will pass. Sometimes with doctor's, we even try to slam the door shut on their problem with an introduction or adjustment of medication.

Understanding me, has helped me more than anything to get myself better physically. I try to do the same for myself mentally, and encourage my clients to do the same.

New Crabitat

We've had these crabs for over a year! They were not supposed to live very long, but they are still with us. Recently they got pretty inactive due to unappreciation, so I rescued them from Madison's room and built them a new crabitat. They love it! I spent most of the evening watching them (and taking pictures). They almost show off because of the new audience. It makes me wonder if we all need to change our routines sometimes to increase our motivation. I am amazed that God designed almost all living things to be better with a pair. Things are much more interesting and worthwhile if we have friends with which to share our lives. It's also fascinating to me to watch these creepy critters defy physics. I'm going to get a video of one of them changing shells. It's creepy and cool at the same time. Enjoy!

Wonderful Weather

The wonderful weather reminds me of college! Those first days back were bittersweet - starting the year was always exciting. Those of us who would stay for the summer were saying goodbye to some of the best times of our lives, while getting reacquainted to all of the friends who were rejoining us for the regular semester. The best afternoons were spent relaxing on days like this week, gathering at the frat house or beer garden (we didn't have beer garden's in the 80's at Murray, but they looked fun at the other colleges I worked at later). It was a common site to see a couch on the lawn on days like today. Good times indeed. I'm sure I could find an 80's kick-back song to play, but this is a modern song that reminds me of those late summer/early fall days in college. Yahoo says it has been at the top of the charts for 71 weeks, making it a record holder. I can see why. I'm sure that it will have timeless appeal. Enjoy!

Heaven Bound

When I counsel, I can't always show my emotion. But, today, I have felt emotional all day. A woman who I am very fond of has been struggling with cancer. She called me a few times and talked to me about facing the end of her journey as we know it. She spoke to me while at state fair. She was upset and crying. We prayed and I promised to call her when I got home. I did, but was not able to connect. I have called every day. Today, a family member called to tell me that she is hours from her new destination. I felt relief for her, but he said it best when he said that he wanted to be selfish and keep her here. I understood him perfectly. I told him to tell her that I love her.

I have lost several friends to death in the last few years. I have admired them all. It has been my honor to be their confidant - their friend. It is my honor to remember them today. I am emotional, because I feel grief and loss. But, I thank God that I know that they are living now with him in heaven. I know that Mrs. H will be there soon.

The Perfect Song - Wild at Heart

Gloriana

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Cool Things at State Fair

Robert's Fascination: Angora Rabbits













Melissa's Moment: The National Guard Truck


















Madison's Favorite: Fair Rides

The food was outstanding too, but we paid quite a bit for it. Somehow, that reduces the AHHHHH to an OUCH factor. However, the funnel cake was pretty awesome, and the powdered sugar sprinkled on our faces and clothes would have made a great picture! We wouldn't stop eating long enough to snap the shot.

2009 KY State Fair Results

We are home from the 2009 KY State Fair. I can sum it up in 2 words - Goat Show. We arrived on Friday and left late Saturday night. There were over 500 goats and 200 kids showing, making it the largest livestock show at the fair for the second year in a row. Only one kid and goat mattered to the large Kelly family cheering section on Saturday. It was awesome for her to have them there. Even her Dad wore the pink club shirt to support her. She would never say it, but she knows he would not wear pink for just anyone. Madison and Henry did OK - respectively. She placed 4th overall in the Skill-a-thon, getting her name announced and roars from the Kelly section. In showmanship on Friday, however, Henry did not stand still (see video). You'll notice that he even knows when to turn, but he does it too early and goes all the way around to look at the judge. Remember, he's got ADHD in a bad way. Needless to say, our kids (Jr. Team Critters) did not place as high as we had hoped in showmanship. But, it was good for them to get a little taste of humble pie. Sometimes when success comes too quickly, you forget that hard work is required. The fact that Henry did not work as a team was a sign that he was not used to being "worked" as a team. He loves to play as a team, and Madison may have learned a bit of a lesson. Check out her blog to see what she has to say about it. He did place 8th in his weight class, which I thought was good considering the set-back we had with him earlier and the fact that he's grown up instead of out - that's all a testament to Riley women who have fed and cared for him this year. There were probably 22-24 goats in his weight class that included a 3 pound variance. There were 22 classes altogether. He also weighed in at 70 pounds, which is good for market if we go that route. We think we will keep him until the North American show in October and see if he will top out. Madison may redeem herself if she works with him a bit in the next two months. It's up to her. In the meantime, we are planning for next season already. I'm thinking about a part-time venture with goats. Can you even imagine that? I can imagine it, but reality is a different matter all-together. Pray for me.

Jr Showmanship Division - 2009 KY State Fair

Shared - Combat Veterans and Institutions: A Systems Analysis

I found this on a blog I follow, written by Scott Lee. Check it out!

Combat Veterans and Institutions: A Systems Analysis

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Mother Guilt

Madison and I had a conversation that baffled me yesterday. At the only goat show that she attended without me, she won a Grand Champion banner - a very special award. I mentioned the irony of her getting her biggest award this season when I wasn't there. She chided that I was insistent that I had to work that weekend and wouldn't come with her. I asked her why she was quick to point out the things I didn't do because of work, but not so quick to notice all of the things I get to do because of the flexibility of being self-employed. She said something about me always working - even when I was at a show. I did take paper-work with me for the hours of down time. She informed me that she hated it that I'd do work at the events. I asked her why she wasn't as upset at my husband or her Dad because they worked and usually didn't even go to the shows. Her reply, "Because goats aren't their thing". The conversation continued for about 3 more minutes until I knew that my logic was clearly no match for hers. I've learned to just shut up before I get mad.

But, I ask you this - What does it all mean? Why are moms (and some dads) so darned if we do and darned if we don't? Granted, I do like the goats. But, it's tedious on show days - long hours. I do have to work, whether she likes it or not. Does she mean to guilt me, or is it just her ego-centric self telling me that your world should revolve around me and only me? Then, I feel myself worrying that she's spoiled and ungrateful. I get ideas that I should do less for her to teach her the lesson of appreciation. It all adds up to a good ole' fashioned dose of Mother Guilt.

I admit that I fantasize about sending her to live with a large, money-thrifty family for about 2 weeks to see how life could really be. But, she'd probably try to make me feel guilty for that too. If I was my own therapist, I'd tell me that the only one who can make me feel guilty is myself. HMMMMM, I wonder what the Henderson's (6 kids) are doing for the next 2 weeks?

4-H Dances

I love to Sally-Down-The-Alley. Isn't life awesome when the greatest thing to look forward to is the dance that night at camp? The neatest thing is that everyone dances with everyone. Don't ask any of us older folks how we felt after a few days of "sally" - athletic people are lying too because they don't use those muscles either. This year the kids did quite a bit of line dancing. Here's one of their favorites.

Expo Ready - KY State Fair here we come

This is the equivalent of Henry's spa treatment! He's getting his hair blown dry before he gets a trim. If I were him, I'd wonder when the humans were getting their trim. HA! What do you think he's thinking?

Our Club!

We got new shirts. They are cool. I wanted to show the design - compliments of our club leaders. The boys in our club got to pick out the color! They think that guys in pink are cool! I have to agree.

Should Christians take psychotropic medication?

I don't write professionally often. But, a close friend of mine recently surprised me with this question. I get it in my office frequently, but I didn't think-which is always the first mistake-that someone of her experience and intelligence would have such a faith-based concern. I was glad that she was open enough to ask. I thought that others might be interested in her question and what I had to say.

Her question:

"I need to ask your advice on something. The church that I have been going to believes that things like depression and other illnesses like that such as bipolar is when you let the devil in to your life. They don't believe in taking medicine for that. I am not sure I agree with that, and I wanted your opinion".

My response:

Let me ask you what the church believes about illness like diabetes and high blood pressure. Those were once thought to be devil-inflicted.

This is what we are taught as Christian counselors (besides my professional training, I am also a member of the American Association of Christian Counselors).

We assess in this order:

Does the disorder have a medical explanation first? Thyroid problems can cause anxiety - panic attacks. People who have had heart problems are almost always prone to a subsequent depression. Heart by-pass patients are prescribed an antidepressant, scheduled out-patient counseling, and visited by a psychiatrist several times before discharge at the best heart hospital in Nashville. If a mother has recently had a baby and falls into a severe depression; that’s post-partum. Has the person taken meth or LSD that is causing their hallucinations? Family history is key too. Likewise, teens and elderly persons are higher risk populations for dysthymia - a form of depression.

Then, we seek an emotional connection. Did the person experience a recent trauma, work stress, death in the family, loss of job, relationship breakup, etc. Were they abused as a child or adult. Was there attachment issues or anger issues? Have they had a deterioration over the past few years or months?

Then we look at spiritual situations? Did they dabble with the occult in the past? Were the victims of religious rituals at other times? Did they play with wigi boards, worship idols, pray to other Gods? Are/were they preoccupied with morose thoughts? Have they had a faith crisis? Are they questioning their salvation? Were they religiously abused?

There is a group of counselors who believe that people can be afflicted by demon oppression and are in need of deliverance. Others believe that demons can’t dwell in the same body as the Holy Spirit. I believe the scripture that says “My grace is sufficient”.

NOW, to answer your question. I think there is medical proof that sufficiently supports that depression and other mental disorders can be chemical imbalances in the brain that benefit from medical treatment including RX intervention just like diabetes and high blood pressure and cholesterol. I think that sometimes a situation causes depression, then an imbalance, or an imbalance can cause a situation. It goes both ways. To say that they are always conditions of lack of faith is ignorance and dangerous. Severe bipolar and schizophrenia require medicine or the person will be delusional and/or hallucinate. I have worked with several people that are "normal" on their meds – “crazy” without them. I believe in divine healing, but I would never advise a person to quit their meds for any medical condition. Many of the folks I work with do not take meds, but many do. Some take them ongoing, but most take them when they need the help. Most psychological problems are episodic and are not continuous. PS. the Greek word for SOUL is psyche - mind, emotions, and will. Psychology is not separate from God, he created it as much as he created science.

I believe that the devil is alive and well in mental illness (many of the people I mentioned above have religious delusions), but he works by fueling the doubts that God is not sufficient to help us through our dark times, that we are not worthy of the love of Christ, and so on. In my opinion, we help him if we say that a person is not a strong Christian if they suffer from mental struggles like depression or bipolar. That’s why we need to use the tools that God gives us in this modern world to help us to be better – each other, prayer, faith, and meds.

Hope this helps you in your exploration.

Love you,

Melissa

Eat Mor Chickin - Diss BK

We ate at Chick-fil-A today! I love the slogan!

More about the cows!

Do not confuse good chicken with that served at a place called Burger King. Besides, why would you order a burger at Chick-fil-A, or chicken at Burger King? Afterall, BK claims to have subservient chicken! He does everything you ask him to do via online command. He's fun to play with, but I like the kind of chicken that you can EAT! I stopped playing with my food a few years ago. "Yeah, it's like the cow says".



For more on subservient chicken, read The Corn Blog, by Bro Ray!

Wounded Warrior Project - Home

This is something that the DOD seems to be doing fairly well. It serves our wounded active duty men and women until they heal to the point that they are fit-for-duty or are "transitioned" to the VA system. Take some time to read about the project. I'll be blogging about it again. Keep in mind that the soldiers are physically and/or psychologically harmed during active duty service.

Wounded Warrior Project - Home


Our Mission

The mission of the Wounded Warrior Project is to honor and empower wounded warriors.


PURPOSE

* To raise awareness and enlist the public’s aid for the needs of severely injured service men and women,
* To help severely injured service members aid and assist each other, and
* To provide unique, direct programs and services to meet the needs of severely injured service members.


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She's County

I took this on Facebook. Below is my response!

Melissa took the How COUNTRY are ya? quiz and the result is 75% Country

Your pretty much all country but your town was a little "bigger." You had plenty of stop lights but there was no real cool place to hang out at. The Friday night hang outs were outside a local business, Wal-Mart or just in a church parking lot of your choosing. The biggest clubs in your high school were 4H and the cosmetology program from which you knew every graduate. Your accent isn't THAT bad but enough to get attention from any "city folk." You might not always wear cowboy clothes but you definitely have owned a pair, a huge belt buckle and have worn shorts with boots before and your parents have a picture to prove it.

Ha, I wore boots with shorts this past week at 4-H camp in fact! I once had a shiny Crumrine belt buckle that I wore with my TIGHT wrangler no-pocket jeans and Justin boots, but after I had Madison they didn't fit my hips anymore. I am more county now than I used to be, but I have always been country at heart! I'm thankful to get to live it vicariously through my daughter's life now. She'd be more country than me as evidenced by the fact that she didn't think that our used Toyota truck that we bought to be a "beater" to haul her show goats was "hick" enough. My friends think that missing hubcap on the front does the trick!

Jason Aldean
 
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Henry - Therapy changed my life

My name is Henry. When I was a small child, I was taken from my mother. Soon after they cut off my horns and castrated me. I was sold to a person and taken to work on a farm. I was surprised to be put into a barn with many other "kids". I didn't know anyone there, and they were bigger than me. A few of them who were born there, pushed me around. It all stressed me out. I didn't feel like eating, and I just wanted to sleep all day. At night, I was unable to sleep because of the weird noises. The person who was my owner would catch me and drag me around by a harness. Although she was nice, she would pull me against my will and make me work. I was scared.

Soon, I was tired and sick to my stomach. I felt bad - hopeless! My head and tail hung low - my sides sunk in. I was admitted to the hospital for a few days. They gave me medicine and fluids. My person came to visit me each day. I decided that I liked her. I slowly gained my appetite.

When we got back to the farm, I was greeted by the other "kids". They seemed nicer. Indy told me that he was glad I was back, and we became friends. I realized this was home, and I was hungry. I got special food to eat, and medicine to calm my stomach. Soon, my therapist began to visit me regularly. She brought me fresh alfalfa hay to eat. I found myself telling her about my fears. When show season began, she talked me through my feelings of inadequacy when I did not place very well. She pointed out that my person loved me anyway. I had a hard time keeping focused, and I squirmed a lot. We decided that I might have attention deficits. She began to work with me each night. We used some behavior modification techniques to help me to focus. I loved the positive reinforcements - food, attention, affection, encouragement. She began to call me Grand Champion, and I could see myself as a winner.

It will not matter what happens at State Fair. I will perform the best I can. Therapy has changed my life! I am a Grand Champion!

County Fair Time

It's that time of year! COUNTY FAIR TIME! This past week we attended our county fair! Madison had several entries that are headed to the KY State Fair including a great Bug Collection, a Annual Flower Assortment, a Wood Stool, a Bulletin Board, and a Tomato Plant that her and her PaPa found from last year's garden (see previous blog). He told her that some bird probably ate some tomato, pooped out a seed, and it started a new plant. Doesn't that sound like a grandpa thing to say? Whatever happened, it worked to create a nice tomato plant. I had heard her tell that story, but didn't realize it was the prize winning plant until she was telling the story to our Aunt Marcia who laughed loudly.

Madison showed her goat at two shows. She got second place in showmanship at both with Henry! He is such an adolescent. He was better this week about walking in and standing still, but he looks around like he's got ADHD - might as well. He's got anxiety and a nervous stomach. Why not ADHD? I guess I could use him as my new business mascot, huh?

Speaking of fairs. I took this picture of Madison and Bailey in 2006. Isn't it the best fair photo ever? I need to enter it into some kind of contest! Why didn't I think to enter it into the county fair? So much to do, and so little time! Just remember you saw it here first!

Blogging again?

It is difficult for me to do things half-way. Blogging is no exception. I have a difficult time finding the time to do it justice. But, I was surprised when people started asking me when I would blog again. Since I have asked many of my clients to begin blogging, I thought I would write a word of encouragement. Blogging can be like writing in a journal. It doesn't have be politically correct or grammatically accurate. It is a representation of you. I remember the first blog I wrote - not knowing where to start.

Just Type!

The Saga of Henry

I can't believe I have not blogged about Henry. Madison bought her own show goat this year. He's going to be a prize winner!!! She actually bought him with her own money that she made last year from all of her 4-H winnings. He was very reasonably priced for a show goat, but let's just say that he better be a prize winner! However, after a few days, Henry quit eating and his tail went down (not good). Within two days, he was a bag of bones on 4 wobbly legs. Since he didn't know us yet, he was a sad little guy. The other goats didn't seem to console him either. Our 4-H agent was out of town, so we had to rush little Henry to the vet. Can you believe that we drove him in the back-seat of NaNa's Caddy? He didn't mind, because he was so sick. Dr. Todd pumped him full of IV and told us that he was shy and stressed. Just our style - Henry needed some Prozac. After two days in the "hospital" he was still not eating very well, but Doc let him go because I think he thought we might take up residency at his clinic. Henry seemed to perk up a bit when Madison would visit. So, pumped with fluids and orders for a special diet including rabbit pellets and Prilosec, Henry made the return trip in the floor-board of my Honda Accord. Thankfully, since that time, he has eaten well - seems like he worked up a bit of an ulcer. He overcame his fears, and has gained his weight back and then some quickly. He's a bit shy when any of us go to catch him, but he's expecting a pill poked down his throat. He's not shy around the other goats now, and has taken his place in the social order of the group. He likes me, because I give him his alfalfa treats. Catherine (the trainer) is going to kick me out of the barn. I told her I was an equal opportunity spoiler as one of her goats was eating a treat from behind my back after he rubbed on my leg like a puppy dog (not a great thing for show goats). : )

Mother's Day Gift

For Mother's Day, Madison's class made a great gift. It was a recipe for sugar cookies tied to a recipe card titled Recipe for a Great Mom. The recipe card read (in Madison's handwriting). . .

Melissa
Mother of Madison
slim, loving, willing, a 4-her, says "clean up the stairs"
Likes Krissy (Madison and Robert's cat), her computer, flowers
Loves Me, Robert, Henry (Madison's goat)

Also attached was a cookie cutter in the shape of something that reminded them of "Mom". My cookie cutter was the next best thing to a goat - a sheep. Sometimes she throws something together, but this project was thoughtful. I can tell by the intention of her words. I like the word "willing", and wonder what she means. I like that she mentions the discipline that I give her - someday that may make some sense to her. I love that she included the 4-H stuff that we do together. I giggled that she threw in Her animals for good measure - she's always campaigning for them and any other breathing four-legged critter - hot or cold blooded. I hope she believes that I am loving because sometimes she reminds me that I am her worst enemy. Those times hurt, but today's note warmed my heart. It's a keeper - just like her.

What does He think?

I really had intention to blog more often, but life is busy. Clients have flooded in during these hard times, and I find it difficult to keep up with my responsibilities to all. Any free time, I want to just chill out and enjoy life. I went to Wal-mart for the first time in a month or more the other day. That tells you how busy I've been. But, I couldn't resist posting this. I was shocked, but not shocked. I do not have anything bad to say about President Obama as a man, but I have been concerned about how people have idolized him. Is this proof of what people are thinking of him? I hope he does not begin to see himself in the same light. Read about the portrait "The Truth", that will be unveiled on the President's 100th day in office.

Jesus and Gravity

I haven't blogged in a while, because I've been busy. I took a few days off, and haven't relaxed at all. So much to do in the Spring. But, this post is for so many of those who inspire me - clients and friends. Today's is Easter - Resurrection Sunday. What an inspirational time of the year. My faith has been challenged in recent months, and my answer is always the same. "It boils down to two things - belief in the resurrection and the three times in my life when God met me on my knees in a very real way. If he never shows himself to me again in that way, those times were powerful enough to last my lifetime". FAITH! I can't always explain the Bible or the reasons "why?" to all of the human questions that so many have. I can't guess the mind of God. The Bible says that his ways are not our way - afterall, he is God - creator! The amazing ways that so many of my friends have managed trials until they were able to claim them as triumphs is reflected in a wonderful new song by Dolly. I dedicate this to those of us who need a whole lot of Jesus and Gravity.

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Keith at the Opry!

Madison and I got to spend a weekend together a few weeks ago before she went away on Spring Break. We spontaneously decided to check out Keith at the Opry! It was the first time that Madison had been. I posted on the fanclub message board that I thought I'd be in tears when Keith sang, because Grandma Joyce (Anderson) and I used to listen to the Grand Ole Opry every Saturday night that I would spend with her in Picher, OK (near Keith's hometown). She would have loved to see/hear an Anderson on that stage. I wrote, "It will be an emotional time for me, and Madison will look at me and wonder what the big deal is (she's 11). One of these days, she will say that my first time at the Opry was to see Keith w/ my mom, and she cried like a crazy person."

The show was fun. Madison asked when someone was going to play some real country. Of course, she's too young to know that what she listened to all night was REAL country. We didn't know that when Keith came out we could walk to the stage until they announced it at the beginning of the evening. We were excited about that. Madison was the first to the front and I was right behind her, so I didn't have tears - just smiles. Keith looked good - healthy. Everyone looked nice. Keith waved at Madison and me, but she wasn't sure that he recognized her. The kids grow so much between the times the he sees them, that I'm sure that it's hard for him to know exactly who they are. She felt that his performance was the best, and I honestly agree. A young group, Love and Theft, were pretty good! They are the ones pictured from the balcony. I do love the bluegrass, too. And, the finale was Ronnie Milsap. He sang a gospel song, Up To Zion, that was rockin!

It was a good evening, and a memory made. We'll see Keith next at the fanclub party in June, and he's playing close in July. Madison might be showing goats, and even Keith takes a backseat to them in the summer!

Spring Planting

Who better to learn how to plant a garden from than your grandpa? When I was a little girl, we had a garden as big as our house and then some. I hated to garden because it meant endless work during hot weather. YUCK!!!! Mom canned all summer it seemed and I cleaned vegetables, snapped beans, shelled peas, topped strawberries, shucked corn, and diced okra and squash until I was sick of it. The thing about a garden that big, is that once you get one chore done, it's time to do it again. I think we planted a half acre of strawberries. Who needs that many berries? I might have enjoyed gardening if it were a tiny plot like the one Madison is going to grow with her Papa. They used the Almanac to decide when best to plant, and tilled a small place in the corner. Uh-Oh. Now that I think about it, that's where the tomatoes usually go. I'm not sure where they will go now, but we will surely have to have them planted somewhere. HMMM? I'll make a note to ask Dad about tomatoes - best thing grown in a garden if you ask me. This was last weekend, and there is already lettuce and radishes coming up. Hope the Almanac takes into account today's freezing weather. Just imagine - my daughter liking gardens, goats, and fishing. Can she really be mine? I think that grandkids are inclined to enjoy what their grandparents enjoy. If that's true, she's got the gardens and fishing right anyway. The goats are growing on all of us!

Madison's Dad

Many people ask me if Madison's dad is tall because she is so big for her age. I think it's funny that many people think she looks like me, and in some ways she does. But, here's proof of genetics in action. When Eric has hair, it's the same color as hers. He just shaved off his winter beard which she teases him about because it grows in red. She favors her Dad more and more, which suits her just fine. EXCEPT - Eric got the Huff (mom's family) height. He's about 5' 8'. The Kelly's are all easily over 6 foot tall. We think Madison takes after the Kelly side of the family for height and build. I won't comment about the Kelly temperament - stubbornness and tenacity comes to her from all branches of her family tree. Thankfully, she gets alot of good qualities from all of us too. Besides, what we do to spoil her genetically, her step-family members make up for by spoiling her with love.

Reading Christian Fiction - The Shack

Recovering from the flu has taken longer than anticipated. I worked the same week, but would come home and sleep my evenings away. I'm just now starting to feel like I might make it. I haven't felt like blogging, but I have been reading.

I recently read a book called The Shack. It's a fiction book about a man who goes to a shack and meets with God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. I was not turned on by the concept of the book at first, but I found myself enjoying the symbolism portrayed throughout. I know many Christians are not in favor of the book, because they think the author has been too liberal in his writing. However, I love the way that he inspired me to think in new ways. It was a literary challenge, and I didn't find any of the ideas he presented offensive any more than I found the Lion, Aslan, from Narnia, offensive.

One of the ideas I liked was that the trio had all of the time in the world to spend with the character, Mack. I kept thinking that surely God needs to get back to work doing other things. Doesn't he hear all those prayers that are beings spoken, and why isn't he responding to the "God-signal" like Bat Man instead of taking that leisurely walk with this numbskull who just doesn't get it? But, you know that's exactly how God would be. He's "ours" alone. He can do that because of being omnicient and omnipresent and all. He can walk and talk with us anytime we want. The trio is there at our personal beck and call 24/7. Another thing in the book is that Mack keeps asking "human" questions that the various cast of the trinity try to explain, but they warn first that it will be beyond his understanding. Sure enough, it get's deep quick. You know, that's how it is w/ God - simple, but deep. Haven't you been there? Other things that captured my attention: Jesus is not handsome, which suprises Mack a great deal; God is not an old man at first; the Holy Spirit is not human exactly - and they all love to eat!

Lastly, the message is about forgiveness and how easy it is to let our human-nature steal our joy. It is about relationship, and serving each other out of love not selfish expectation. It's got several other object lessons that are worth considering.

It would be a real stretch to say that the book is scripturally accurate. I'm not even sure that was the goal of the author. There are problems with the representation of the trinity. There are a few comments about free will that seemed off-kilter. There was some interpretation problems with the section on judgment. I have included a link to one review that seemed to address some of these concerns thorougly. You must remember that The Passion of the Christ had similar critics. But, as a whole, I thought it was a positive contribution as well.

Listen folks, The Bible is the Word of God - anything else is interpretation. The Bible does say, "Now the Bereans were of more noble character than the Thessalonians, for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to see if what Paul said was true. Acts 17:11" I do not read books or watch movies to get my "truth". But, I personally think that it's OK to challenge our minds to explore and ponder the life of Christ, the character of God and the nature of the Spirit. If you have never looked at Jesus and let yourself wonder what he was really like, take this time leading up to Easter to consider it. I think of the human Jesus who did a super-human task for ME, that I might have a personal relationship with the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost! AMEN!

Got flu? Get well.

I can't recall if I have ever had the flu, but I have it now. I remember getting mono my freshman year in college during finals week. I took one of my tests with a trash can beside me - you know what that means. My throat got so swollen that I thought I would never be able to swallow again. This is a milder version of that, except I just want to sleep all the time.

I went to the doctor today, and he asked why I didn't come to see him Friday. Because, you'd just give me another prescription - is what I wanted to say, but he would not have been amused. So, here's what I learned - if you get the flu, go to the doctor quick! They can help you in the first 24-48 hours better than if you wait like I did. Who knew?

I did leave with a prescription, and a warning to call if my cough gets worse. I was ordered to cancel my appointments for a week, but I negotiated 3 days instead. The great thing is that when I called to tell my clients about their cancellations, they were truly concerned about me instead of upset about their appointments. Many called back with get-well wishes. Another sent this funny video to me. As I watched it, I was (1) trying to decide if one of the background dancers is my youngest brother Chris (he'd do this in a heart-beat); and (2) wondering what prompted these guys to put this amount of time and effort into this type of activity. This took some incredible work! But, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

18 Again

The day I turned 18 (June afer I graduated), I loaded up a few of my possessions and moved to Nashville. Not because I wanted to explore my music career, but because I wanted to make it on my own. I used what little graduation money I got to put down a deposit on a small apt with bars on the windows and crickets so large that you could hear them hit the floor when they jumped. I had roaches too that really liked the honey-nut cheerios that I lived on. I got a job working at the Shoneys on White Bridge road. There were 6 of us that worked that summer, all about the same age - three girls, three guys. We worked hours and hours, and would close the store at about 1:00a and ride with the windows down when the streets were fairly quiet. Then we'd sleep and do it all over again the next day. It was a crazy summer - but fun!

This week, Jamey Johnson, did a free concert downtown. It was my day off, so I drove to Nashville. It was a great day for a concert - the weather was perfect. The MUSIC was great! It didn't last nearly long enough. After the crowd died down, Jamey came out of his bus to sign autographs. I got in line, and asked the two young women if they would take my pic with him. I asked who they were and where they were from. One said that she had just moved there the day before. She said that she was technically homeless until she found a place to live, but she was going to try her hand at song-writing. She thought it was so cool that her second day in Nashville was spent at a free down-town concert. The other young woman said that she was from Washington state, and was going to try to make it in the business. I was inspired by their youth.

Going to Nashville that day reminded me of many things - my own youth, courage, and gumption. I suppose I have made it, but not on my own. It's only by the grace of God that I have been kept safe in my travels. I'm not sure if Jamey Johnson is a Christian, but he has suffered and makes references that might lend a person to believe that he met Jesus at that time. His music reflects the hard life that he has led, and is not appropriate for many (parental discretion strongly advised). But, his sound is traditional and edgy. The kind that we listened to when we'd cruise the streets of Nashville in the wee hours of the morning with the windows down and the music cranked up.

Doctor Visit - The oddity of me

I saw my doctor this week. This time, I was actually feeling OK, but sometimes that's when you have the best visits. I handed him the list of meds that I take showing the 9 prescription and the 6 non-prescription ones. We talked about what I might be able to do to reduce the list. We talked about my symptoms: hair loss, weight loss, dry eyes and mouth, aching joints, anxiety, IBS, dry skin, mood swings, fatigue, and skin changes. He reminded me that my body attacks itself - aka: autoimmune disorder. My rheumatologist has said that I have connective tissue diseases with Sjogren's Syndrome being the only one identified for sure by blood test. If you don't know anything about Autoimmune Disorders - if you have one, you have several - or at least the symptoms typically overlap. They can be difficult to diagnose by blood test, and are not always present w/ classic symptoms. For instance, the first thing to be treated actually, was a thyroid problem. I became hyperactive about 8 or 9 years ago now - Graves Disease. That's when my anxiety appeared in a mighty way and I lost quite a bit of weight and hair. The other symptoms appeared in different ways. It took me many years before I was able to draw a connection between the various symptoms. Of them all, I think the IBS is the worst to cope with. It is a nightmare to say the least. When it is active, I am miserable.

The Medicine.Net site is one of the best I have found about Autoimmune and other connective tissue diseases. I have found that they do not usually mention an accompanying mood or anxiety disorder, but they are there for many with any chronic illness. Those who suffer with Lupus (like my Grandmother) would be the first to tell you that. It has been recognized longer than other AI disorders, but is still very difficult to diagnose.

What advise would I give others? Know your body, treat your symptoms, and take care of yourself as best you can - physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Get plenty of rest and reduce your stress where you can.

By the way, I left with one more med than I came in with! Of the 9 meds I take, 3 indicated that I needed something to protect my stomach from damage. I would have argued, but I have had terrible indigestion lately. I was wondering if it was my meds. YIPEE! Lucky ME!

Honestly, I am thankful that I can afford meds and that they are available to me! Thank you Lord!

Sleeplessness

I haven't been sleeping well for days - tossing and turning at night, sleepy during the days. I laid in bed today til noon not wanting to get up. I slept finally last night, but I just didn't want to get up and face the day - the next week, for that matter. It will pass - always does. I have the advantage of knowing that I am blessed, because I see people who are in pain each day. But, during these melancholy times, I can't help but wonder where I've gone.

The Rope

I write with sad heart because there have been so many deaths lately in our community. I read about two young men's lives cut short since my last blog post - both younger than me, leaving behind wives and small children. I stopped what I was doing and sat back to reflect on the implications of their deaths. I put myself in the shoes of the widows as they plan the services in the next few days. I shuddered as I thought about the pain they must be feeling - the kind that feels like not being able to breathe the next breath because it hurts too much. God promises that he will never leave us nor forsake us.

There is a song that goes, "In water's calm I sailed from shore to see what I might see, and having never sailed before I drifted aimlessly . . . I woke to see the light grown dim and dark clouds gathering round. In haste I worked at turning back, but now the wind blew wrong, and when the night came cold and black my strength was almost gone . . . But with one last small thread of hope, I bowed my head to pray, and through the dark I saw a rope and heard a calm voice say, "Grab the rope, hold it tight, in the distance shines a light. Neither fear, nor feel alone; There is One who'll bring you home".

Like in life, the song does not say when God will deliver the calm that we desire when our lives are stormy, but when we hold on tight to HIM, he will be there with us. I have held on for dear life to that rope at times, and I am thankful that He is always really the one holding me!

6 years AGO

On Sunday, February 16, 2003, we woke to discover that ice had covered everything north of us completely. The town of Hopkinsville was fine, but just a few miles north going towards Pennyrile Forest State Resort Park, the roads were covered. On any other day that would have been no big deal, except that our wedding was scheduled to be at the lodge that afternoon. Robert's family also live directly North, and were going to have a difficult time getting to us. After several attempts, we decided by noon that we could not possibly get to the location.

We went to the church to let most of our friends know and to check out the possibility of using a room there. Fortunately, there were no plans for evening church. We could have our wedding there, but there was no way to take down the stage prop (a bridge) being used for an ongoing sermon series or the praise and worship equipment. We had to make plans on the fly for food and refreshments because that was to be taken care of by the caterer at Pennyrile.

While Robert made calls to our guest list, I rushed to Walmart for treats. We snagged a location for dinner for the family, and pulled off a wedding in about 5 hours. Robert's family pulled into the parking lot about 15 minutes before the show, and my folks raced in a few minutes before because they were busy setting up in the reception room. I got Madison and myself ready in less than 20 minutes.

What I remember most about that day, is who spent it with us. We have lost many already who were there - Grandma and Grandpa Brown, Mr. Clayton, Cathy. I believe Robert's mom when she says that she would have driven a snow plow to get there, but she was going to be there. All said and done, it was a beautiful wedding (bridge and all). Robert says he doesn't remember much of it (he does not adapt well to sudden change). That's why we have pictures. HA I remember thinking that it just resembled life - always changing, unpredictable, and never what you expect! Our wedding day was one of many times that we have had to adapt to change. What's important is that we are doing it together!

Valentine Anniversary

I'll give you three guesses where this was taken, and the first two don't count. By the way, these are not of the Iris variety. They are the largest orchids I have ever seen, and I think the scent could have put me in a trance - like the poppys in the Wizard of OZ. Behind me is the famous vine covered (and blooming this season) gazebo that has hosted a trillion weddings (not my own). Still confused? It is in the section known as the CASCADES Garderns of Opryland Hotel - one of my favorite places in the world b/c there is no other like it. I have other pics, but I'll post those on Facebook. Robert and I realized we had not been there in the February month. There were orchids and begonias everywhere - beautiful. I have been in April when the bulb plants are blooming, but not in February. We have only stayed at the hotel one other time on a company trip. We splurged (really) and got a balcony room. Problem is that it was over the Jack Daniels bar. Once we got home from the Opry, we heard the band and Valentine cheers going up into the wee hours of the morning! They should have paid us when it was all said and done. HA

Opry at the Ryman - AHHHH - no better place if you ask me. Featured: Darryl Worley, Kathy Mattea, Restless Heart, The Whites, Ray Stephens, and Connie It was a wild night downtown because the Pred's (hockey) and the Nashville Symphony were also playing in addition to the regular Valentine's hooplah. What a mixture of cultures on the strip last night - and there we were. What does it say about us, that one of the highlights of our trip was the pancake brunch at . . . you guessed it . . . Crackerbarrel . . . on our way home. YEE-HAH!

New Babies

4-H ROCKS!

They are here! The first of the new babies! Don't you love the lightening bolt on this one's head. I think she even looks like him a bit with that face!

The baby lamb is only hours old. We didn't get there in time to witness his birth, but he is a cutie. Brother is up and doing fine after a shaky start.

No little ladies yet! But, the all-girl club is hopeful that the next two goats that are anticipated in the next day or two will be girls.

Cousin Keith Anderson - Somebody Needs A Hug - CMA Edition

It's no secret that I am a distant cousin of county music singer/songwriter Keith Anderson, AKA goof-ball! The guy he hugs in the "dark" is Jamey Johnson who sings "In Color"! AWESOME

Crying for Help - Military Suicide Rates

There has been much published in the National news about a recent report on the increase of Soldier suicides (you can go ahead and imagine that veteran's are in the same boat). For anyone who has followed these issues, this is nothing new, but the Army keeps saying that they do not know what is causing the increase - They know, the soldiers know, heck, WE KNOW. I think it was explained in this recent AP article about the alarming spike in suicides in January.

But, to say that they continue to be ineffective in tackling this problem, makes me angry! How long do the soldiers have to wait until they figure it out? Here is the Army's most recent response to the recent findings that suicide rates continue to climb.

http://abcnews.go.com/video/playerIndex?id=6778377

In that same article mentioned about January suicides, this was said.

In January, we lost more soldiers to suicide than to al-Qaida," said Paul
Rieckhoff, director of the Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America. He urged
"bold and immediate action" by the departments of Defense and Veterans Affairs.

A google search on military suicides has articles listed about this rising trend since the war began, but I can say that not enough has been done from my perspective to increase access to much needed mental health services for soldiers in crisis. I'll just say that as a mental health provider, I know that active duty military have to get a referral from their PCM to see a mental health professional located off the military installation they are stationed mytricare.com - a limitation. It's a practice that has been consistent since before the most recent war began. From what the soldiers say, those referrals are difficult to get if you have not exhausted the military's options. You can imagine that the mental health services on-base are overcrowded and have wait-lists for initial services and follow-up appointments. Sound like "bold and immediate action". Hey, someone tell the Secretary of the Army in the first video that we have an idea about how to tackle their problem!

Although this is a problem, it is not impossible. I know that several pockets of people are trying to do things to help - including the military. One option is to call Military One-Source - an excellent resource! If you are active duty or a dependent, and are reading this - Try this resource first!!!! I'll blog about it another time. Keep praying that those who need help will be helped some how!

If you are suicidal, tell someone - keep telling someone until you find some support! There ARE people who care and who are trying to help.

Military One Source 24/7 Counseling Hotline: 1-800-342-9647

National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-SUICIDE

25 Random Things About Me

I did this for Facebook. Thought it might be interesting to post.

25 Random Things About Me

(1) I am fascinated by people and the human condition. The strength of people amaze me.

(2) I am the priviledged confident of hundreds of wonderful folks who call me their counselor. I've been in practice since 2005.

(3) The older I get, the more of an encourager I become.

(4) I am amazed by the truth and purity of scripture.

(5) I dislike mean and aggressive people. I avoid them if I can.

(6) I have met many interesting people living in all areas of the country. After leaving home at 18, I lived in 28 different states. I came home to KY to live when I got a divorce in the late 90's.

(7) I love country music b/c my grandmother shared that with me when I was little. I am interested in knowing how the industry works and how stars are discovered.

(8) I am a registered Cherokee indian - a tribal member of the Oklahoma nation.

(9) I spent 15 years working in colleges in KS, WYO, IL, and KY after I got my master's at SIUC.

(10) I actually lived as a military wife for several years. My daughter's father and I married while he was in the Marine Corp.

(11) I am thankful to say that I have no addictions. I see too many people who are hostage to their vices, and am glad that I do not have that problem.

(12) However, I like to be on the computer too often. Mostly for work, but it would be my other favorite pasttime (if you were to ask my daughter).

(13) I am passionate about veteran's affairs and the ravages of military combat on their mental health.

(14) I met my current husband playing church coed softball - HA - something I had never done. I knew I was in trouble when I went to practice and the team was in their near-professional gear to practice. They were undefeated since the founding of our church. It was NOT love at first sight.

(15) I inherited an Autoimmune Disease from my maternal side of the family. My grandmother had classic SLE - Lupus and my Aunt has Scleroderma. I have pesky problems that have not been pinpointed to one identifiable disorder. I battle several problems at times, but am currently feeling OK.

(16) I have full-blown Panic Disorder as a result of my thyroid being affected by the autoimmune DO. About 5 years ago, it was out of control, and quite humbling - especially for a counselor. It is under control now, and has helped me when I work with anxiety DO's.

(17) I'd be nearly silver if I did not color my hair! But, it is still as curly as ever! I did not lose any of the curl during or after pregnancy!

(18) My daughter and I are pretty active in 4-H. She's such a "farm" girl even though we live in the city.

(19) I'd love to sing and play guitar, but I haven't done either.

(20) My husband wants me to begin to shoot clays and targets. I did that when I was younger, but it's been too cold to get myself interested so far. I'll keep you posted.

(21) We do not have cable TV, so we don't follow sports or TV shows. Where do you get the time?

(22) I am thrifty when it comes to money. We have nice things, but would rather save than spend.

(23) I would rather live somewhere where there is a beach and warm weather most of the time. I can see myself retiring some place tropical.

(24) My favorite food is by far of the Mexican variety, although I think what we are used to is not really Mexican at all. I knew better than to eat the real food when I lived close to the Mexican border. It would make your eyes water just to smell the food.

(25) There is nothing more heavenly than the smell of a citrus orchard in bloom. Anyone know what I'm talking about?

My First Blog Post

I've tried to write a post for over a month, but I've felt self-conscience - like 20,000 people would read this or something. Ha. Well, appropriately, I'm sitting here in my PJ's. Aren't you supposed to blog in your pajamas? You ask what I'm still doing in my PJ's at 10:00a? It's technically my day off- well, out of the office. Which means I get to do about 100 errands at home, AND a mountain of paper-work. The worst part of being a counselor is the paper-work. I've wondered what I will use my blog to accomplish besides take up more of my already stretched time.

I don't really want to concentrate on counseling issues because of the possibility that clients will think that I am blogging about them - which I would not do. Actually, I can not do - but they should know that. If I do include a counseling topic from time to time, it will be general. I love how my friend Ray blogs about random things and stays away from "preachy" things although he is a preacher - and a very good one at that.

I have noticed that people are surprised that I have lived in 28 states and done many things in my 40 years. So, I think I will blog about some of that. I enjoy talking about the things I've learned from others and the unique places I've lived.

As you can see, I live in Kentucky. I was only without power for about 8 hours. But, it has been an incredible week after the winter storm raged through the area. Now the temps have plunged into the teens. I can't imagine the problems with the workers who are trying to get power back to the residents. Please keep us in your prayers!